I think this is the first new year eve that I'm looking forward for something in the following year. To Mr SecretService and others,
After installing the computer, I did a casual surfing for awhile and I tried to sleep. I dunno how much i slept. I felt no warmth at my feet throughout the sleep. I tried to cover with sweater so something, but in the end I gave up getting my feet warm. Then I could not sleep and watched the sky turn bright. Yah, today is *A* busy day. Bless me. Mr BLOG
My computer crashed today when I got back home, because of harddisk bad sectors. Just when I need the PC more urgently than before, it crached. I got to re-install a WIN98 just enough for me to surf the web for tonite. The process is a painful one, but lucky I got the information that I need in the end. Tomorrow will be a busy day. Need to accomplish many tasks. Mr BLOG
Exam is finally over, whether I got a pass or fail do not depend on myself. From tomorrow onwards, I need to find something to do, re-organise myself. Why do people always come to me on things I know little. I can't help/give them any constructive advice. Instead, I myself need help / advice from them. Mr BLOG
Last paper today. But dunno why, lots of hing happened these few days. Got to know that my co-sup was in NUS and met LHW and talk about me. This made me nervous. My JC. friend talk to me until 5am this morning, trying to solve a dead problem, or a problem that's not worth to solve. And there are many other things, which I dunno what to do. Exam is at this evening. But I haven't finished studying. Those guys are (as usual) still playing bomberman. =( Mr BLOG
I sort of 'study' the whole day. But I could hardly concentrate. And reading the notes today then I realised how much I need to study. To study all in one or two days is hardly possible. I sort filter away those that are hard to understand and not likely to come out tomorrow. Now I come to the last 3 sets of notes out of 12 sets. I think that will be it for today. I'll leave that 3 sets tomorrow before the exam in the evening. Whether in HK today is cold, freezing. It's raining outside, only 8 degree as of 9:00 pm. I think by now it would be as low as 5 degree C. Mr BLOG
Well...in campus the whole day. Trying to study for exam. Studying is now is the only excuse not to other things. I'll definitely have to face it once it's over. I can guess what the 2 sups will react when they learn that I've done so little in this xxx (can't remember) weeks. Wanted to go back to my room and rest early today. Then I found a video clip off the web, makes my heart beating fast, and irregular. People always say dun do such things particularly in the period, but it just comes during this period =( Mr BLOG
Just created this and uploaded all the pic I have in my pacific site. Would it be more permenent? Mr BLOG
besides shaky body and heart beating fast, I'm now feeling depressed and empty. Empty as in dunno what to do, and how do i go from here. Depressed as in just got 'poured cold water' by a *banker*. Mr BLOG
I think Hongaila is feelin too much stress.... shaky body + heart beating fast = symptoms of stress.... must relac a bit.. :) DC
I was supposed to go for the seminar, at 10:00am, then when I brought myself to get up, I heard the usual sound sequence from the toilet. I knew that I was not going to make it to wait for him to get out of the toilet. I was quite certain that that guy next to my room is a smoker. I can always heard that 2 disgusting sound, as if he is trying to cough out some phleem from the month. Then I rushing like hell to make myself presentablewithout going to toilet. Then after the seminar, I did not know why I feel so tired. I went back to my room and slept until 3pm. Even why I'm feeling that my body is so shaky, heart beating fast. That's not a very good time to fall sick. I have so much things yet to be done. And I started to feel the sense of being ignored in the lab (even that chinaman... *sigh*). Maybe I should stay in my room from now on. Mr BLOG
2nd Edition: (what was I thinking when I first posted this? I dun even know what I talk about) The first paper finished yesterday, although I have more one paper to go, I do not intend to devote all my time on it. Of course I will still study. But I have to really plan what to do... a plan for everything. I'm at a lost right now. Mr BLOG
My friend just told me in case I xxxx, I can choose for re-exam or I can choose to take another course.... Oh no... I cannot burn the note now... SHIT!.... (I'm never wanted to burn lecture notes on fire.. but...) Mr BLOG
I was walking back to my room from the lab. I got excited whenever thot that I have the chance of tearing the notes into pieces. As usual, I'm feeling like Ah-Q. I came to accept that if I do not get any credit for this course, it's not that bad after all. At least in the future, I'll remember, and I'll be reminded of this course and the lecture(r) for this is a TOTAL waste of my time. AndRemember, DO NOT buy "7601" for 4-D, it's a waste of time for Q'ing and waste of money. Mr BLOG
Tomorrow is my first paper. It's a *CLOSED* book paper. I always feel so uneasy about this because I can't memorise *ANYTHING* and it is the first "closed-book" exam i have in xxx years. Just now, I was trying to recall when and what is the paper that I last had a closed book exam, but I can't find anything. I even go to the module mounting site, trying to find a module that I remember having sat for a closed book exam. Very surprisingly, I found none. The closest thing I can recall in my undergrad days is the Scheme mid-term test, with only an A4 size cheat sheet. Other than that, I can only remember have sat for closed book exam in my A-Level, which is (counting my fingers with *both* hands) 8 years ago!!!! Quoting what Mr Blow always says, "I'm Doomed". updated at 12:40am: While flipping through the notes, I suddenly thought of putting this whole set of notes into rubbish bin or putting the notes in fire after exam tomorrow. This is the first time I have this thought. Mr BLOG
Went for a lunch with those guys in the lab today. It's called the traditional 'Super-Pass" lunch or dinner.. ppl in HKU has this event at the end of every semester. By "super-pass" they hope that for coming exam, they can get a distinction or A+, that's where the name comes from. Of course after lunch they went back and continue their own game-mode. And I went back to my room Mr BLOG
Oh... just got back my last assignment. I got 7x while the rest of the lab got 9x. I wondered what's wrong with my assignment. I look closely into it. It seems that I made nothing serious mistake. Oh, I found I didn't submit one of the answers out of the 4 questions. That's the reason why. I remembered just before I was rushing to meet LW. My friends told me that one of the answers was wrong, so I quickly changed it, reprinted and merged the answer for *that* quesion with the new answer. But somehow, I took out answers for 2 questions, one of it does not need modification. Since each question worths 25%, I got a 7x% while the rest got 9x%. I didn't feel that sad afterall. Mr BLOG
My co-sup just told another guy that it's just sufficient to pass the courses. I'm abit worried about this because I do not know what to do now.... I have have much to study, not because i know everything but I just dun know what to study. On the other hand, I'm given a hard problem to solve... I was browsing thru the net, and many many existing methods... but i dun understand all. I haven't met my Co-sup for a month, and I'm getting abit worried. Mr BLOG
I went to few places with LW and her parents.... they are basically tired. But I think (or they made me think) they feel quite satisfied. And From tomorrow onwards, I can no longer wait or delay. I must start studying. Mr BLOG
Hmm... sometimes I go to postgaruda blog site hor.. I see only old news.. only when I want to post something, then I can see the new news.. so weird.... DC
i finally managed to free up the trapped hard disk space by the dumb linux that kernel panicked! Shifted all data to c drive and fdisk cum formatted d drive entirely!!! YEH!!! NO MORE STUPID LINUX!!! NO MORE KERNEL PANIC!!!! I prefer BSOD! Mr Blow
Met LW and parents this evening. It was lucky that I decided to meet them at the hotel lobby instead of MTR station that was suggested by her. Supposed to meet at 7:00pm but they only reach hotel at 8:15pm!!! I managed to do a one-person shopping at Tsim Sha Tsui under the XMAS environment and setting. I was smart that I brough my own memory stick so I can post a few photo I took with her. They are here,here and here. Mr BLOG
I finally get VNC working in my office PC. The problem is that I set screen saver for my PC. That's where it caused all the problems. I can finally 'work' remotely. Fianlly got news from LW, in fact I was hoping that it could be after xmas, then everything would be so fine, Productivity has not been good today. I yet again convince myself that I shouldn't spend all my time studying, cos my sup just would not care. Mr BLOG
After watching satorare, i realize this may be the jap movie that I've always wanted to buy off the rack at a few stores selling vcds 1/2 a year ago. On the cover, the woman looks young but in the show... They were both sitting by the river.... It's indeed very touching, esp when the grandma volunteers to be operated by his grandson. Mr Blow
Did I do that? Maybe I did it half-consciously. Anyway, today I can't say much about my work. I just do this and that, each work abit here and there and the whole day is gone. As people who know me realise how long is my ICQ list, wheneverI have 10 poeple online. But I seldom talk to them. The longer you have talk to them, the more you are willing to start a conversation. Then just now, I initiated a chat with someone i know when i was a media. He went to boston to study and work. But I was really surprised that he's now in Singapore. Then I realise that as I'm having tremendous change in life, he is experiencing that too. His father just passed away this may, and had to fly to and fro boston and singapore, until just recently he came back to Singapore for good. And now he has to find a job. It's really too sudden for me. Still remember that he used to drive a volvo, and now he drives a honda. Last time, when he cracked a joke, I would think that it's so boliao, but now not any more. The feeling is just different than last time. Has he grown up or have I changed? Mr BLOG
Why u sign off as Mr Blow? Why u suaning me again? Hey! i juz heard that my prev lab fren in Boston Uni only sleeps 4 hrs for every 2 days. The rest are spent studying. Maybe u wanna follow suit. BTW, i had the same feeling when i was studying for my masters. Perhaps the modules that I've taken are fairly easy cos they appear to be 1000-2000 level difficulty. I realize that to be in CS major, you must be very very mathematically and logically inclined. After attending the theory of computation lectures, i realize that my mind has been dead all these years during undergrad without any vigorous training (like back in those JC times). I need to work harder. Sighzzz 6 more months to beachbumming days. Authentic Mr Blow
Hurray!!! I can go HK to see Ngai Lam.... hahaa... so fun... long time never see the stressed NL!!!! DC
I told Mr Blow what i noticed over the past week. And he seems that his reaction of this quite mild. This made me feel that I'm over paranoid compared to him. And today I just confirmed that he's upgraded to the level of master. While talking to some other earlier on today, then i realise that exam is just 10 days away. The funny thing is I dun feel that urgent as before. It maybe because subconsciously, I've already treated it as it cannot be saved. Mr BLOW
People in the lab asked me to go for their Convocation this afternoon in the place that singers hold their concerts in HK. But later I heard that it's be quite boring. Furthermore, I promise myself that I should rot (that much) from today onwards. Today is a good day, cos no one will be playing AOM in the lab. So in the end I said I'm not going. Mr BLOG
DC asked me just now whether he can stay at my place... I said I dun mind, and I ask him to bring something back for me. I wanted to get rid of it as i dun see any need at home, and I get uneasy when i see it. Something that others would not understand. I think after being rotten for almost a week, I told myself I told myself: "Hey, although it can't be solved, you still have to go on right? The exam won't wait for U, unless you are going to quit." over the last 2 days, I've been forcing myself to read on the bus. So far it was alright, but I just found that things that I read before became so unfamiliar. Mr BLOG
sounds like the 70s band ABBA :D the generic WL trailer has been playing so often am getting sick of seeing my face on teevee :X hope the episode is tomoro so it can be over and done with vote me out, quick!! :P Mr SecretService
I had to be back home forthis weekend. Now i need to think what should i do next, should i do A then Bm or B then A? Mr BLOG
As all of you expected. I could not do any thing meaningful today. But I came out with this. Mr BLOG
After one whole night of thinking, I more or less convince myself what i guess is probably true. It's been a total of 42 days, or 6 weeks for me to come to that conclusion. Mr BLOG
I was chatting with Mr Blow until 1am. We were talking on topics that usual guys would not talk about. Suddenly I remembered that for the thing that we were talking about, I saw it *somewhere* recently. I was so worried and excited, quickly went and searched in google. Although my brain doesn't work as well as before, my eyes are still sharp, as commented by someone else. But I do hope what I saw is not what I'm thinking. I do hope my eyes fail me. Mr BLOG
Wow! This weblog is funny. Yesterday i came here and it was dated to the message about the Subaru Impregza Challenge. Happened for the past few visits. Today when i look back, wala. I guess u muz b perplexed in which to proceed first. If u do your research, which seems to be arduous and never-ending, your academics may suffer. But if u study for your exams, you're worried that there's no progress in your research, which still requires a lot of effort. If i were u, i would give up studying and concentrate on my research. Maybe that's why i get so poor grades for Hon. If u were u, u shd focus on your acads first cos i believe you're quite lost in them also rite? When u're bored of studying, pick up a research paper to read. Gentle reminder: always make notes. Old folks like us tend to forget things very fast. Can't u juz plug in your earpiece and blast your music? It puts u in this void and u won't be aware of the teeny weeny bits of sound in your surroundings. Perhaps u r a bit stressed. cos when i m, i get irritated even when i hear somebody flushing the toilet. Mr Blow
Just got back the quiz, and got the news that the last assignment is cancelled. I'm one step nearer to failing the course. =(
I now do not have a clear direction on what I'm going to do. On the studys, I have a few more assignments lining up, and of course I need revision. This is the time that I worry about whether I can manage to pass that particular course that I take, unlike in the undergraduate days. On the research side, I'm on a path that is extremely difficult. It's difficult to start, difficult to continue, difficult to progress. On the other side, I do not know what to proceed. Maybe I'll have to find a balance point between all these things. (It suddenly reminds me of a "fixed point") Most people in the lab today has gone for convocation, a small one only by faculty of engineer, a big one (university wide) coming later. I find that I can only read things when I'm entirely alone in the lab. My room seems like a good place for me but it's too comfortable. So nowsdays usually i stay up in the lab until 2am, or even later than that. Before 11pm, I cannot really concentrate and do some constructive stuff. People in the lab would always be talking. Initially, I though that was the problem of others that made me not able to concentrate. I just discover that even when I was in the lab with another person, the sound of opening drawer, sound of hitting on the keyboard, alerted me. So which mean I could only do those boliao stuff in the day and try to concentrate in the night if I coul still do so. This is becoming worrying. Mr BLOG
Life After 19th Aug Garuda Flight. This blog is especially created for the Schemers, or those who care to read.
